The loss of a gaming friend

[andyofne]

A dear friend of mine passed away today. His name was Allen Roberts aka =CBBF=Wingman.

At least one or two others here may have come to know =CBBF=Wingman through countless hours of BF2 and COD4 game play.

A couple years ago, I joined the CodeBlue Battlefield gaming group along with some other 'GMC' players, some former CBGB's and Tempus were also members.

After a time I was invited to be a recruiting admin for the group. They never liked calling it a clan.

Anyway, we recruited a guy playing by the name of "Wingman". He was soon added to the ranks. He was one of those guys who enjoyed the game the most when he was helping other people earn their promotions, medals and various badges in BF2. He was probably more excited about my earning general stars than I was myself.

But beyond being a team player he was also a good friend. He would listen well on Teamspeak and would remember personal things about people and would always be concerned for how things were going. In short, he was a good friend.

We spent hundreds of hours playing BF2. I mean day after day we would join up on the empty CBBF servers waiting for other players to join so we could get the servers going. He worked hard to make sure that everyone enjoyed the game. I know that he and I would often sacrifice our own personal goals to keep the teams even and to provide a more balanced gaming environment.

Sadly, a little over a year ago, I decided to leave =CBBF= for personal reasons. I felt burned out and wanted to just sit back and relax. My friends at =CBBF= felt betrayed, however, when I joined up with another less formal group of players. I never planned on joining any other group but I said "what the hell, why not."

I think Wingman took the "betrayal" the hardest since we had been such close friends. I always regretted that he felt that way. It was never an intentional slight against the group and especially not against Wingman.

After my departure Wingman was promoted to an admin position in CodeBlue and worked hard alongside the rest of the admins and kept things going.

Recently, I started hanging out with the =CBBF= group again on Teamspeak and playing COD4 with them almost nightly. Wingman and the rest of the group treated me with respect and kindness and our friendships began to mend.

Just a couple nights ago Allen and I had an opportunity to talk again like we used to when we were hanging out waiting for the rest of the folks to join Teamspeak. It was a real pleasure and I'm really glad that I had the opportunity to speak with him again as a friend.

I am somewhat comforted to have had a chance to mend fences with him.

I'll miss Allen very much. I count him among a small handful of 'internet' friend that I would have enjoyed meeting. I am very saddened that I never did get the chance to do so.

I know this is trite and silly but please take a few moments to think of a friend, either in real life or online, who you haven't talked to in a while or with whom you lasted parted on rocky terms. Send them an e-mail to say hello or give them a call.

Who the hell knows when next you'll speak.

Allen was just 39 and that's a damn sight too young for anyone to die.

farewell Wingman. It was a pleasure knowing you.